Things have taken a turn for…well, I think it’s not the worst yet but it feels like we’re going there.
Before anything else: I hope we find a way to help however we can.
I have been trying to keep a routine that’s as close to pre-pandemic life as possible: wake up the same time, work the same hours, log off the same time at night. It’s useful to remind myself of the things I can control and keep those things intact so I don’t break down. Some days I feel like it, some days I don’t, which is a luxury I feel guilty about a lot of times.
In one way or another, work can be a coping mechanism, for better or for worse. This has kept me afloat since I started working from home. But also! Really I’m just super thankful I still have lots of work to do and I can still earn as usual despite everything.
The feeling of being overwhelmed comes in waves. I’ve gone through the first big wave of anxiety and slight panic when we first went on quarantine. After a few weeks I settled into the steady new routine I had set for myself. This week, though, I feel like the next wave coming on.
Some things in my life so far:
- I updated my website.I really like switching mediums and working in different ways depending on the project, and for a long time I’ve been wary of putting all these varied work in one folio because it might look like I don’t know what I’m doing lol. Happy and relieved to see that things fit together after all.
- From the kitchen.
• I’ve made a couple of batches of cookies, one of them being butter-less on that week that we had no butter (used coconut oil instead).
• Kimchi pancakes. Super no brainer.
• Tofu dumplings from scratch. It was tiring and tedious, I didn’t roll my wrappers thin enough, and they looked crude because I don’t know how to pleat dumplings properly. But! They tasted good, and I managed to salvage some tofu before it went bad. All in all a small accomplishment.
• Cordon bleu, but we had no breadcrumbs so I had to crush Skyflakes instead. It was ok. I had them for three days.
• Kimchi rice on so many instances because it’s so easy to make, it’s hearty, and I’d like to think it’s nutritious.
3. Reading: The Baron in the Trees, Italo Calvino.
Phenomenal by Leigh Ann Henion on audiobook.
Watching: Depending on my mood, I alternate Something in the Rain and a Weightlifting Fairy re-watch.
In the past month I’ve finished Reply 1988 (so good!!!), Crash Landing on You, Itaewon Class (wasn’t the best, honestly just finished it because of PSJ and the outfits), and Kingdom S2.
Listening: Sometimes I put my headphones on then forget about it until an hour later when I realize nothing’s playing…
4. I got a bike for emergencies. I know nothing about bikes but Jake, the second most patient guy I have ever met, helped me pick a good one. Big plus points for the color. Looking forward to the days when I can ride this for fun and not out of quarantine necessity.
5. I used a menstrual cup for the first time today and I’m never ever going back to pads again, thanks. 10/10 would recommend! It takes some courage and time to figure out how to put it in and all but it’s worth it. Excited to spend the rest of my periods NOT sitting on a blood-soaked pad all day.
I’ve stopped planning my years ahead because it brought me so much anxiety and frustration trying to make things happen / trying to cope when things don’t. 2020 started out great. I started catching up with old friends one by one, did not have a single argument with my parents before they left the country again, even booked a birthday trip to Tokyo because I finally have some travel funds again (now cancelled). Ah life.
Taking it an hour at a time.